State of the Union Preview

Through my extensive Washington contacts, I was able to snag a preview of Bush's speech for tonite.....

"Folks, it's been a real blast raping and pillaging this great country and taking away your civil liberties for eight years. Sure was fun landin' on the aircraft carrier. Sucks about Katrina. Oh, and those 935 lies my administration told before we invaded Iraq? Weren't lies at all...I's jus' jokin'. I'm a joker, see? Bringin' a little levitization to the folks. And Terri Schiavo: I'd do it all over agin' for ya, darlin'. Now git out there and spend those rebate checks when they arrive in June or August or whenever. Make sure you send a thank-you card to China, since their lenderization is makin' possible your spenderosity. HehHehHeh..."